Won

It has taken you nineteen days - thirty-two since your meeting with Kim - but you now have a working, fully-functional-with-ported-number Z1010. Congratulations. You are happy and will recommend Three to all your friends because you are a money-grubbing whore - you earn $50 credit for each friend you recommend that ports their number to Three. They also get $50 credit. How is this different from a pyramid scheme? 'Pyramid schemes don't come standard with Z1010s,' you reason - thereby proving that you are totally insane and beyond hope.

Thus ends this saga. Stay tuned for the prequel.